A Lot of Wind

Hendy Cup, April 19

YC&AC Over 35s 0 v YC&AC Seconds 1

The Over 35s had been looking forward to this annual clash with the Club’s Second Team. We felt we had an excellent chance, irrespective of the Seconds’ lofty position in TML Div. 3 and fine run to the TML Cup semis. The bookmakers concurred, installing us as odds-on favourites.

The game was played in blustery conditions which didn’t help either side, especially the hoof-ball Seconds. The Over 35s, who by contrast like to play a quick short passing game, settled the more quickly into the contest, and it is no exaggeration to say that for long spells here we dominated.

The Seconds seemed not to enjoy the experience one little bit. Irritation was etched into their faces as we snapped into the tackles and pushed the ball around confidently.

Shortly before half time, rather against the run of play, the Seconds went ahead, courtesy of a controversially awarded freekick. Phil Denham hit it from about 35 yards out on the right at the Paul Blamire Shed End. The delivery looked to have cleared the heads of everyone in the box before it dipped suddenly five yards out to be met six inches off the ground by the diving head of Gavin Margetson, who had ghosted in unnoticed behind our defenders. Great goal. One from the training ground perhaps?

Undeterred, the Silver Machine pressed on, but we weren’t able to create much in the way of clear-cut chances. The best fell to Thorstein Strand, who hit a shot with his ass that cannoned off the underside of the crossbar and bounced clear. We’ve not enjoyed much luck in the Cup competitions this season and it would have been nice to get a bit there.

Certainly, few would argue that a draw, with an Over 35s win on penalties, would have been a fair result.

Never mind. An excellent performance this from the Silver Machine, and one that clearly rattled good TML opposition.

At the end it was good to see the two squads facing each other in lines in the traditional Japanese manner. I’m sure too that the Over 35s would have sportingly applauded the Seconds as they lifted the Cup. Unfortunately, the Cup was nowhere to be seen.

A job for Alan’s dog, perhaps?

By Alex Hendy

Squad: Full strength

Goals: To win it next time. Convincingly.

Man of the match: Gavin Margetson. Deceptively good. Capped solid performance with great goal.

Referees: The Seconds didn’t think much of them, but we thought they were OK.

Cards: Don’t recall

Attendance: Not many

A Game of Three Quarters and One Quarter

Game 18, April 12

YC&AC Over 35s 4 v Midorigaoka 4

The Silver Machine was on the receiving end of one of the great comebacks in football history on April 12 when Midorigaoka rallied from 4-1 down in the final quarter to finish on level terms and leave the home fan furiously wagging its tail and barking its disapproval. Not since, oo, November 2007, when Korean Connection came back from 5-3 down in the final quarter to triumph 7-5, have we been so completely and utterly comebacked upon.

When will we ever learn? Could it be that Captain Sada will need to rethink his selection strategy next season and bring in a bit more experience?

Ominously, in an e-mail a few days after the game, Sada described our performance in the fourth quarter—in particular that of our “big hole” of a midfield—as “pathetic”. We have been warned.

Daylight Lobbery

They’re likeable opposition, Midorigaoka. Not quite Marinos Papas or Johnson & Johnson likeable, but likeable enough. To a man usually well over 35, these boys take the game seriously but never get niggly or unnecessary or quickly to the byline, and they’ve got just enough about them to make our inevitable victory feel hard-earned.

From the start here we tore into the old devils, knocking the ball about nicely and scoring freely—once Alan Plater had opened the floodgates for us anyway. “He shot over the goalie’s head when he came out from the goal mouth,” Sada reminded me in the same e-mail quoted above. “It was about 25 meter shot, a good one.” “1st goal was mine,” Alan nonchalantly concurred. “Lobbed over the keeper from about 25 yards.”

Our second goal came from me, a power header (honest) from 10 yards at the PBSE following a great Martin Hornung run and cross. Jogging in between the two central defenders I leaped, hung in the air for a second, then gave it what for with the full force of my forehead. The keeper just got a hand to it, but such was the strength of the header that the ball bent back his fingers, snapping them, before accelerating into the back of the net.

Goal three was a Martin Hornung humdinger. It came at the SPE, a spanking left-footed drive from 14 yards after a trademark surging run down the right and sudden 90 degree change of direction close to goal. Martin’s shot narrowly found the gap between the right post and the horribly flapping fingertips of the brave Midorigaoka keeper.

Shortly afterwards a rampant YC&AC struck a fourth. Somebodyorother slipped Alan through for a one on one with old Floppy Fingers. The poor chap got down ever so well to parry Alan’s flick, but our striker quickly latched on to the rebound and mercilessly rammed the ball home.

4-1. Out of sight!

Before I describe the horrors that then ensued, what we all need here is a picture break. So, building on the resounding success that was the Caption Competition earlier in the season (zero entries), here’s another little brain teaser for you all. Name the famous Over 35 footballer walking in the centre of the picture below. First person to “comment” with the correct answer gets to wear the imaginary opal-studded “Football Brain of YC&AC” belt until the next quiz.

And back to the report.

Newly anointed MIP Stephane Laure Martin set the tone for what followed with un but contre son camp absolutely bloody incroyable. One of their lads had punted a hopeful cross into the box from the right at the SPE, fortuitously as it transpired picking out an unmarked Stephane at the far stick. Stephane had enough time to light himself a cigarette, smoke it, juggle the ball a few times on his shoulders and clear with a bicycle kick, but chose instead to turn the ball into the net first time with his knee. A sadly smiling Stephane explained afterwards that the ball had bobbled up on him at the crucial moment. You could see that.

Tetes up, lads!

Alas, 4-2 is a very different scoreline from 4-1, especially when it soon becomes 4-3. Suddenly Midorigaoka were all over us like flies on a Kobe cowpat and it was no surprise when the pests struck their fourth. It all happened that quickly. And no doubt it could have been worse. My notes say that Trevor Burton-Towell was once again excellent in goal.

By Alex Hendy

Squad: Most of the usual

Goals: Alan Plater (2), Alex Hendy, Martin Hornung

Man of the match: N/A

Referees: They do seem to have improved

Cards: I think both Stephane and Tom got booked in this one.

Attendance: Alan’s dog

Any Other Business?

Game 17, April 5

YC&AC Over 35s 1 v Albion Old Boys 2

Albion Old Boys currently lie second in Tokyo Metropolis League 3, six points ahead of YC&AC Seconds with a game in hand. For a team that doesn’t always field a full (let alone full-strength) side (two forfeits this season in the TML), that’s good going.

True to form, and just as they had in their recent match against the Seconds, AOB turned up for this one with a grand total of nine players, eventually.

“We need two volunteers to play for the opposition,” mumbled Captain Sada in the pre-match huddle. [Tick, tick, tick.... shuffle, shuffle] Patrick Newell volunteered. He’d played for Albion in the past and would be content to do so again. [Tick, tick, tick... shuffle shuffle wiggle shinpads stretch thighs...] Russell Brown volunteered. He’d “got a dodgy hamstring anyway.”

I’m told that we were struggling to find opposition on this weekend, and we should therefore be grateful to those members of Albion and friends who traveled to Yokohama for this friendly. We are. However, the almost complete absence of “volunteer spirit” among the YC&AC ranks pre kick-off surely indicates that many of us would rather have a free day with our families or play an in-house five-a-side than make up the numbers for an understrength opposition. I could be in a minority, but I don’t think it would hurt if the sports administrators considered this possibility and kept the players informed.

Anyway.

Peeeep!

Early doors and you sensed that Albion weren’t desperately keen to bust a gut in this one—a non-TML fixture against YC&AC’s league-less “other” team. I’m pleased to report that this apparently relaxed attitude began to mutate as the game wore on. Irritant-in-chief seemed to be our superb offside trap, which coming with Adams-and-Keown-era-Arsenal arms raised and loud appeals has been such an entertaining feature of the Silver Machine’s game this season. By the third quarter AOB forwards were ranting at the ref, cussing anyone who’d listen, and starting to get a bit sharp in the off-the-ball tackle. Game on!

Dennis Stanworth makes sure.

In due course we fell one behind—I really can’t remember how and you don’t care—but in the second quarter, not entirely against the run of play, we pulled one back. Marcos Pereira got it with yet another glorious strike that doesn’t quite qualify as a contender for goal of the season.

Playing toward the Paul Blamire Shed End Marcos came waltzing in from the right with the ball glued to his toes and his eyes glued to the ball. As I came charging forward through the centre screaming for the pass, the posse of defenders in front of Marcos parted a little. Our Brazilian Magician saw the crack of light and let fly—with the outside of his right boot—sending the ball screaming with fade across the keeper’s dive and into the bottom left hand corner.

A truly weird and special goal celebrated in a truly weird and special way. Half-crouched, legs wide apart, his upper body flexed into a muscleman pose, Marcos yelled into space with mad bulging eyes. He looked like Bill Bixby on his way to becoming the Incredible Hulk in a shirt that wouldn’t rip.

In the third quarter Albion found themselves down to ten men when YC&AC loanee “Deep Heat” Patrick limped off with a recurrence of his old calf injury. Four or five of us were sitting on the bench at the time, and each of us pretended like we hadn’t noticed. Guilt or something finally got the better of me however and I moved to pull on the yellow bib of Albion. “Don’t do it, don’t do it,” came the appalled cry from the bench…

I have to say it was a wholly distressing experience. When I crafted a chance for their man Vernon on the edge of the box after a fine piece of work down the left (!) I thought dementia could set in at any moment.

In the interval before the final quarter we recruited young Simon Carden from the Seconds (“nooo… give them someone crap!”) to volunteer for Patrick’s left-back slot, giving Simon instructions not to cross the half way line, or else. To the lad’s credit (or his father’s?!) he did as he was told. (Good luck in your exams, Simon. As they say before the big ones in football—Just go out there and enjoy them!)

Peeep again

Could the Fives hold out for a hard-earned draw? No they couldn’t. In the last couple of minutes one of their defenders fondled the ball out of defense right under the nose of the referee and linesman. Everyone stood around chuckling expecting to hear the whistle, except for that criminal of Albion, who galloped forward and in no time pushed the ball forward for one of their frontmen (onside!) to slot home.

Oh

well.

By Alex Hendy

Squad: Big enough to represent two sides.

Goals: Marcos Pereira

Man of the match: Trevor Burton-Towell. Several fine stops helped to keep us in the game. One diving save low to his right at the Swimming Pool End drew gasps and applause, while a brilliant tip over from a Mick O’Hagan blast drew a high-five from the AOB danger man himself.

Cards: There was a little flurry of yellows in the last three games of the season… Can’t remember in which games though. See Golden Slipper page for final individual stats.

Attendance: Yes